A Day Off
by Purpleground
Summary: So what happened when the gang took a day off from training? For the record, just being Normal.
1. Who's Line is it?

Disclaimer: I still don't own Kung Fu Panda even if this is my third KFP story

Inspired from Po mimicking Shifu in the movie. Tai Lung is included. Reason? Nah, I think you can find a tons of them at Fan Fiction.

* * *

**A Day Off**

It's past morning. Shifu had shut himself in his quarter for the whole time, preparing for future course add-up; he specifically demanded not to be disturbed. Meanwhile, Tai Lung was sent to order replacement weapons in the nearby weapon smith, and will return by noon. Tigress and Viper had gone down to the market to get their daily supply, over a list of endless items that had them arguing.

The rest of the boys spent their time in the kitchen, preparing for lunch: Mantis helped seasoning the meat, Po stirred the soup, and Monkey does the dishes.

Crane volunteered to cut the vegetables, and he was very active today. Chopping the carrots off swiftly with a knife held by his leg, he did it so fast that his friends became astonished - probably due to the fact that he watched Po did it all the time.

When he noticed their stares, he asked, "What?"

"Oh, nothing…" replied Mantis with a smile. "Master Po." He bowed.

Crane briefly stared at him, "Oh ookay… Thanks."

He continued his work, speeding up the chopping actions. Then poured the ingredients into the soup with a flash of his beak, he gave it a stir and tasted the liquid instantly. "AWESOME!" he spat.

_Although it is really, really lack of salt. _

_In fact, there wasn't any yet.  
_

Monkey simply laughed, quickly leaped over to get his hat. "Hey! What gives?" shouted Crane as he failed to defend his property.

The monkey wore it on and bended his arms to mimic wings. He scratched himself specifically using his foot, while the others watched. "Yeaaahh," he started. "That really looked like you, Po."

The panda raised an eyebrow, "Owh-ho-ho... … I will take THAT as a challenge." He put down the scoop, and walked towards Crane on his four.

"Looked at me! Ho-Ho-Hah-Hah!" Crouching on his knees, Po swung his arms wildly in the air. "You like monkey fist?"

"Hey, I don't do that!"

"COME on, there is nothing else I can do."

"Really?" Crane smirked, "Sorry to disappoint you, o' Dragon Warrior, but you can't scare me with that!" He did several punches in the air. "You wanna feel it, you wanna feel it? Oh yeah, you wanna feel it, don't you? Now get ready to feel the THUN-DAAARRR!"

Crane leapt toward Po and gave a playful, slow motion chop. "Hai-cha!"

Po blocked back in slow motion. "Huaaaaa!"

"Urghh… You boys should start thinking about growing up!" interrupted Mantis with a grumpy gesture. The others quickly paused.

"That's Tigress, right?"

"Yep."

* * *

*

The girls were back from the market, with two bags of supplies hanging at Tigress's grips.

"What do you think the boys are doing?" asked Viper, slithering along the floor next to her.

"Don't want to know, probably goofing off again. It is getting normal lately."

They overheard the boys' conversation when they reached the kitchen building; they seemed to be cheerful through their tones. The two didn't bother wondering, until they saw who had the lines going.

After tasting the soup, Crane shook his head in delight. "Mmmm-mmm-mmm. How am I doing, guys?"

"I say pretty good," answered Monkey, still keeping his 'wings' and hat. He picked up the bowl with his foot again. "Fine to the tune."

"Really?"

The bug pushed away the bowl instead, "I'll pass. The pepper makes me sneeze."

"But Mantis, you got to try this!" said Po happily, taking the soup with a spoon. "It's has to be the best dish ever!" He turned to Monkey. "But next to banana."

"BOOYA! Score one for the bird!" Crane cheered. "I see me going Cranamonium!"

"What are you guys DOING?!" Tigress barked suddenly, drawing their attention towards the entrance.

Monkey used his 'wing' to adjust his hat. "Preparing for lunch, what else?" The others laughed.

"It will be readied soon." Po smiled at Tigress. "Please tell Shifu."

The feline suspiciously looked at him when the panda travelled on his four – he looked like a polar bear with all that _fats _hanging around.

"I think they are trying to mimic each other," Viper whispered closely.

Crane actively pumped his fists into the air. "Whos' UP for a round of snacks!"

"Yeah, I'm in!"

"I am voting for Cookie first!"

"Hey, that's mine, Crane!"

Tigress abruptly pointed at the exit without looking. "Go and get Shifu," commanded her at the serpent.

Viper stumbled a bit, but slithered off without further argument. Occasionally, Po saw what happened. "Come on, Tigress. We are having fun, don't you see?"

"Of course, a complete act of silliness," said Mantis grimly, crossing his hooks and shaking his head. "You boys are hopeless."

_Hey, that's my line….._

"Well," Crane cleared his throat, "that's okay with us. COME on, Tigress, it's not like the sky is falling." He turned at Monkey. "Am I right?"

"Yeah sure."

Obviously, they are still keeping 'their' side of the personalities.

"Ooh, really?" Tigress smirked, sounding sarcastic as always. "So you think I don't know the meaning of _fun_, huh?" Her tone was a whisper, and threatening.

* * *

*

Shifu was on his way to the kitchen with Viper. Apparently, he was a bit worried by the possible actions Tigress would take. Then, it came to his ears when he was a few steps from the kitchen door:

"Po, you need to have more balance in your stance. Tigress, spar with him. Crane, continue to work on your reflex; Monkey, speed! How many times do I have to repeat myself. You-"

It stopped the moment he entered the kitchen. The first thing he saw was Master Tigress, almost mistook that she had grown a moustache - there was a noodle attached horizontally below her snout, leaving the two ends hanging loosely, drifted by winds.

Both of their eyes locked for a brief moment, before Tigress came to her sense. "Master Shifu!" She quickly pulled off the noodle and bowed at him. Shifu didn't say anything, except leaving his mouth opened, scanning her up and down.

Maybe things did not turn out to be what he had expected, but it is definitely _was_ better this way. He saw this scene before, on Po's arrival.

Normally, he would expect a well disciplined manner from his students. But since this is a day off…

"Where is the Dragon Warrior!?" He fiercely barked.

Without further adieu, everyone pointed at Po.

Shifu smirked. "Eh-huh-huh, HIM!? He's a panda. You're a panda, what you gonna do, big guy? Sit on me?!" He chuckled.

Po eyed at him shortly, and eventually, he understood. "Owwwh," his mouth stretched into a smile. "You mean 'The Dragon Warrior'? He is right over there." He pointed at Crane.

"_What?!_"

The old master raised an eyebrow, and turned to Crane. "Oh?"

Then he smiled, turning back to Po. "Fill me in."

* * *

*

**Lunch Time**

When Tai Lung returned from the weaponry, he was rather surprised to find them… _different_. Which one is weirder: Po cracking himself over a banana, or Shifu speaking out of manner? And what's with that monkey acting like a chicken? Or that bird… Did he take on heroin?

"Orders up!" Crane happily slit a bowl of noodle in front of him.

Across the table, Monkey tasted the food, and said, "Wow, this is pretty good." He nodded at Crane.

"Nooo … I got help from Po…" said Crane sheepishly, but suddenly shook his head. "I mean _Monkey_."

"_What!?_" Tai Lung stammered.

"Hoh-hoh-hah-hah!" Po responded, and took a big bite at the banana; uncontrollably cracked a laugh between the munching, and some of the banana spilt out, but he managed to catch it. "Oh man, this is weird."

Tai Lung glared at him with a disturbed gesture. "You got that right, dragon boy. What the hell is going on?"

"Urrmmmmm…… Nothing really," replied Crane with a twisted smile. "Better dig'in before it gets cold, you know." He pointed at the soup.

"I still prefer steamed tofu. Noodles are simply fats," said Mantis. "You know how much weight I put on with one bowl of those?"

_No shit, what's with you eating that big bowl of noodle then? _Tai Lung thought.

Visibly, Tigress shot a look at Mantis, with a noodle attached below her snout; he almost mistaken it as her new moustache. "You think this is funny?! Tai Lung is sitting over there, and you are still acting like _children_!"

He was rather surprised when someone else answered for him… in a _wrong_ way. "_Yes_, the TRUE Dragon Warrior is _back_!" exclaimed Shifu evilly, standing on his chair. "And the scroll shall be MINE!"

Tai Lung turned at him, looking extremely confused, so Shifu decided to explain under the table. "_Personality swap," _he whispered.

"Don't tempt me to sit on you!" interrupted Crane across the table.

"Really?" Shifu chuckled, now sitting up straight. "I've mastered 1000 scrolls of Kung Fu!"

"Oh yeah? I still got Panda Style! ... Haie-yah!" Crane flapped his fists, and the gang laughed.

Finally, Tai Lung noticed the play.

"It takes years to develop such a dramatic change in the personality."Tigress chuckled and turned to him. "So do not get disappointed if you failed."

_Owh? _He smirked._ You-are-on, kitty.  
_

"Hoh-hoh-hah-hah!" interrupted Po.

Mantis glared at him, "Will you STOP it!?"

Then, it was his turn. "Awwwh, what're you talking about? This is like AMA~ZING. I love it!" Tai Lung waved his hands girlishly. "Po, don't drop that banana. Monkey, nice chicken suit, I like it! Crane, you looked so pink today. Mantis, I am soo totally agree with you. Tigress… Oh, girl, you are so cute under that moustache; and daddy, my dear sweet little papa, I won't have it any other way…. I'm soo love you guys!" He clasped his hands together, held it at the side of his cheek and blinked his eyes repeatedly.

Po was laughing so maniacally until he got himself a breathing problem. The old master can't hide his smile either. Tigress was definitely enjoying herself with her new 'beard'. Monkey and Mantis had difficulties maintaining their strictness, leaking an edged tip at the end of their lips. Crane, for the first time ever, lost his sanity and burst out laughing, slamming the table several time.

However, someone didn't join their game, and it was Viper.

When they looked at her, she lowered her neck down to her coil. Without a doubt, she was shaking.

"Viper, what's wrong?" asked Po, started to get worried.

But she replied with a "Quack!"

A pause followed, before everyone bust out laughing. Crane almost chocked. "AWESOME!" His voice was cracking.

Shifu laughed out loudly, slammed the table and pointed at him. "You got that right, bird boy!"

"Heh-heh… … It's good."

Po started giggling himself on the floor, kicking his legs in the air. Monkey turned to him and sighed, "Okay, now you're over reacting."

"Awwwh~ Brava!" Tai Lung clapped his hands. "Simply splendid! I like the shaky part!" He made his own body trembled. "Owh, you need to make your eyes swollen a bit, girl, maybe with a pointier mouth. That should do it."

"Urgh…" Mantis rolled his eyes and dropped on the table. "Save me from these people…."

**The End** **XD**

* * *

Who Tai Lung mimicked? I suppose at first it's Viper. But there isn't much thing I can get through her behavior. So, I added something else.

Note: Cranamonium comes from Pandamonium.


	2. Wrong Tea

Okay, maybe some of you may recognize. This story is originally called "A Day Off 2".. But I think it would be best to just combine the chap so I can keep them together as one story archieve. Yeah? some of the content had been edited. Hope you enjoy the new version.

* * *

**Wrong Tea**

Sunday morning. Things _do_ smell in the kitchen.

"Okay, five minutes stirring with the spoon, two glasses of water, one half spoon of pepper, a bit of butter, and .. backing powders."

"Err…. Tigress, don't you think that's too much?" Po eyed over as Tigress began to fill in the cooking pot with what seemed like an endless scoops of baking powders. The morning sun shone through the window as the bird chip and chirped among the nearby tree. With Tigress ever so wanted to bake a cake, Po had just volunteered himself to help – on Master Shifu's request to keep her from baking the whole kitchen.

However, Mantis _is_ an intruder. "Well," the bug gave an evil grin, "theoretically she is doing it by ratio. If the book says half glass of water is used, then multiply it by four, we should be using ten cups of baking powder," explained Mantis with a sly smile, "in relative to the two glasses of water used earlier."

"No, seriously I don't think it works that way."

"Who knows," Tigress gave out a playful grit with her teeth, "I am just following my instinct."

_No you shouldn't!_

"Tiger instinct, raooow…" Mantis began to mimic a frightening tiger.

_Mantis, stop boosting her!_

"Okay, I think that will do, keep your fingers crossed and let's _heat_ it up." Tigress closed the pot full of ingredients and began turning up the fire volume.

Just then, Master Shifu happened to come into the kitchen. He gave a few sniffed in the air, eyed around the room before landing his eyes on the boiling pot. "It smells good, how is the cooking process?"

It took him a few second to accept that the bug is in the room as …_Trouble._

"Errr…" Po hesitated.

"Looks fine to me," Mantis gritted his teeth.

_Damn not! _Po felt like screaming, and Shifu happened to miss that one twitch on the panda's eyebrow.

"Anyway, Tigress, why do you wish to bake a cake all of a sudden?" asked the grand master as he took a seat beside the table. The three joined him soon.

"Well, you see, master. Zu's birthday is just around the corner. I figure that I could send something to her, like… a present maybe."

"Zu?" asked Po.

"A little girl she happened to meet when she was down at the market," explained Mantis, "It's a long story."

"Owh-kay," said Po, "how old is she?"

"Twenty, turning to twenty-one soon," said Tigress while avoided eyes contact with the panda. Sometimes his enthusiastic seemed to be placed on the wrong side.

"Becoming a grown-up soon, eh?" Mantis chuckled. "Wow, I still remember my good old days…"

"I don't know – Hey you guys smell something?" Tigress sniffed in the air.

"Ye-ah," Shifu's eyes widened, "I'm looking at it."

_What?_

Hastily, the three students turned to face the source of the smell, and panicked when they spotted an enlarging chocolate mud on the cooking stove.

"What the.."

"I don't remember seeing anything like that on the book," Tigress protested.

"Hell no there wasn't any…"

The unknown organism continued to grow, pouring out the pot like hot brown slime. There were popping bubbles everywhere on its trail.

"I think it's gonna-"

Before Po could even finish his words, there was an epic nova blast.

* * *

Crane was sweeping the front yard when he heard a huge bang coming from the kitchen. At first he hesitated, but then he decided to go check it out; knowing that Tigress is in the kitchen, _it could mean trouble._

However, when he peeked through the kitchen window, all he sees was layers after layers of brownish goo covering the entire kitchen from the bottom of the floor to top of the ceiling. In fact, some of the slime began dangling down like mucous.

_What the hell? _Crane extended his neck further into the room. But when the brownish slime above dripped onto his beak, he retracted quickly.

"_What _is this?" He uses the tip of his wing to touch it, only to found out that the mucous began gluing his feather onto his beak.

_Ewwww…._

Suddenly, there was a movement among the mountains of slime, and came a mud figure popping out of nowhere, gasping desperately for air. Crane almost lost his grip at the edge.

"What the…"Crane flapped his wings once, "who are you!"

There was a silent where Crane spent the time studying this slimy _creature, _while _it _slowly examining the surrounding with one eye.

Then, it registered.

"Tigress?" Crane almost choked, half laughing, "Is that you? What _happened_?"

Tigress let out a sigh as she began to clean herself up. "Don't ask."

Soon, one large pile of mud began moving and swirling what seemed like its arm. It scared the bird off the window.

"That… was awesome!" Po broke out laughing with Mantis on top of his head.

"Guys," Crane catches himself on the window again, "What have you done?"

"Oh, not us," Mantis smiled, "the credit goes to Tigress this time."

"Look," Tigress rolled her one exposed eye, "Don't spread the news to the staff okay?"

"Don't worry," said Mantis with a wicked grin, "My lip is sealed."

"Hey, " Po swirled around, searching for something, "where is Master Shifu?"

The avian raised an eyebrow in disbelief, "Master Shifu is in this room?"

"Heh," Mantis giggled, "funny the way you put it."

"No its not," Tigress sighed.

Looking down at the ground was their usual instinct of searching the red panda - since he is little short on the height, but things were a bit different this time. It shocked them all when they looked _slightly_ upward.

"Oh…" Po was the first to call out.

"Found him," said the gang in unison.

"Tigress," called Mantis with a grin.

"What?"

"Your bread has the strength to glue a small person onto the wall," Mantis finished.

In return to the 'compliment', her ears lowered, her face turned red, with a bitter frown. "Thanks, I will keep that in mind."

"Students," called Shifu calmly after spitting out slime – his eyes were glued shut, so it doesn't surprise them that he was looking at the wrong direction. "I hope you know how to clean this mess up!"

"Yes, master," said the three dryly. Crane had a hard time controlling his laughter, dropping off the window as he laughed his breath out.

* * *

Time passed quickly as they cleaned the kitchen together. It was a tough job, but luckily the other masters volunteered to help them, more like taking chances to ask what really happened. If there was a hole there, Tigress would gladly stick her head in it, instead of getting bombarded by series of embarrassing questions, asking from how she started the baking, to the epic explosion scene. Bad enough for her, Po and Mantis weren't hesitate to share their part of the experience.

After the last piece of 'bread' was picked up, Viper quickly came around her.

"Girl, I think there is another gift you can send to her!"

"Really?" said Tigress, sound uninterested.

"Yeah, it's her time turning into to adulthood right? You can just give her a wine!"

"A wine?"

"Oh yes," said Mantis greedily. "Get party, get together, get drunk…Awh."

"No, I think she could save the wine for another special occasion."

"Whaa..?"

"Oh, nevermind," Viper rolled her eyes, "so what do you think, girl?"

Smiling wryly, Tigress nodded. "Sounds okay to me."

"Great, we can go down town to buy it right-"

"After I clean myself up," interrupted Tigress at Viper's enthusiasm. She plodded off the room without giving the gang a second glance.

After Tigress exits the kitchen, Po gestured to Viper. "Hey."

"Yes, can I help you, Po?"

"Shifu's tea is running out. You might wanna grab some of those while you're at it, can ya?"

The serpent smiled. "Of course."

* * *

Down at the market, the girls spent little time heading straight to the wine dealer, a Chinese goose with a brown shirt. The wine Tigress picked was made from grapes, with the lightest dose she could find, but Viper was not really pleased at her decision.

"Why picked the one with the smallest effect?" the serpent protested.

"Because I don't wish have her ended up like some brainless _toddler_," hissed Tigress, "duh."

"Well," Viper trying to control her smile. "To me, if you warn her enough, she can choose to drink less, so the effect is the same. Come on! You know how it works!"

Tigress groaned. "Fine, I will take the heavy."

Today had been very tired for her, but as for Viper, things seemed to be just the beginning. Beaten and annoyed, the feline simply followed her friend's idea, getting the one that has quite the alcoholic effect. After a small request, the dealer warped up the wine bottle with a nicely patterned box – it is a present after all.

"Okay, now we're done," said Tigress.

"No not yet." Viper interrupted. "Po asked me to get some tea leaf for Shifu."

"Owh…" murmured Tigress tiredly. "Let's be quick. The sun is starting to set"

Indeed, the next stop for the girls was the tea dealer. As the sun began to burrow into the horizon, the market alley was getting isolated. Doors were shut, windows were closed, even the town guards started to lit up the lamps.

"What's Shifu's favorite?" asked Viper.

"I don't know. The one with the aromatic smell, Tiger Hill Tea?"

"Ah yes, that's it!" said Viper. Turning to the dealer, she ordered, "one pack of Tiger Hill Tea please!"

However, they were surprised when the tea dealer packed the leaf in a box which resembled the one they had for the wine.

"What the-"

Without mistaking it, Tigress now had exactly two same packaging of the wine and the tea, one held on her left arm, while another held on the right.

"Alright, okay, owh…. I think I am seeing…" Tigress eyed left and right, "_double_."

"Well, don't messed it up," said Viper, "we'll go straight to Zu's house and deliver it to her parents. She works at the market place right? It will be a while before she came home. Now is our time to move. Let's go."

"Easy for you to say, I can't double check the thing because the boxes are all warped up."

_Seriously…_

The trip to Zu's house was short, and the delivery was done in a snip - with an attached note written by Tigress regarding the wine. They thanked Zu's parents, and leave after giving them a formal goodbye.

"Okay, that was that. Thanks, Viper," said Tigress as they headed back towards the palace.

"Don't mention it," Viper smiled, "Let's hurry back. It's almost dinner. Bet they are waiting for us."

* * *

And Viper was right, the moment they arrive at the Palace, everyone had already gathered in the kitchen, sitting around the table while Po did the cooking as usual.

"You're just in time for the meal, girls!" said Mantis. "I am starving!"

"Here's the tea." Tigress handed over the package to Po.

"Thanks!"

"Hmm.. I will pour the tea myself, thank you." Shifu helped himself over the package.

Seeing how things began to settle down, Tigress began to feel the tiredness overwhelming her. And the first to come are the sweat and stench from the market.

"Phew, I think I need a bath first," Tigress waved herself some air, "you guys go on without me, I will be right back."

"Right behind you, girl," said Viper.

The two trailed off soon, and all the boys in the kitchen began chattering after limitless topics.

Po was having ahead of himself stirling the soup. He soon paused into a halt, thinking deep. "Say, gang. You wanted the soup creamed or not?"

"Yeah, why not?"

"Sure."

"Okay with me."

"I wonder what the girls would say," Po scratched his head. "Damn, forgot to ask them."

"Cream means fat," Mantis began mimicking Tigress's unimpressed look, added with a little bit of girlish accent, "And it wasted all my effort to keep me bodeh slim." The bug strike a very seductive pose. "Aint that right, Crane big boy?"

The avian retorted with a groan, "Ewwwww.."

"Or what it says, Monkey my charming prince of gold," Mantis continued, closing in the langur with a suggestive grin, "Ain't I looked good without all that cream?"

More laugh came from the gang. Shifu didn't joined in, but instead he is busy examining the newly obtained package with much confusion. It caught to the gang's interest soon as the grand master continued to remain silent.

"Yes, Master? Something wrong?"

Shifu didnt spoke at first, but when he did, it was more like a whisper to himself. "Odd." From the warped box Shifu received earlier, the red panda took out a small bottle of liquid. There was not any text on it, so he had a hard time figuring out what's _in_ the bottle. "Did they change the packaging style?"

The gang now dropped their eyes on the bottle."What do you mean? It's the same warping they always used, right?"

"Yes, of course. But I am expecting a leather bag of leafs instead of… a bottle of liquid."

"Well, I guess they changed the packaging method." Po smiled.

Even though the master spent a few more minutes examining the bottle, tilting it around with his little hands, his mind had already set its course – it _is_ tea. "Oh well." He rolled his eyes with a shrug, dismissing the confusion instantly.

After a few more minutes of cooking, dinner was served, and the girls were back in time. The gang ate together as they continue to chat about how Tigress bought her present.

"And I actually had this two same warping in my arms," Tigress finished. The gang laughed. However, the laughter died as soon as it started.

"Wait," Po leaned close to Tigress. "How did the dealer packed the tea?"

"Errr…" Tigress stammered, dropping the spoon slowly.

"In a leather bag, of course, why you asked, Po?" Viper answered. Silently, the boys exchanged a look at each other.

"W-what's wrong?" Tigress began to worry.

"And I thought I had a goooooood selection on tea!" shouted Shifu suddenly, catching everyone's attention.

"Urrh…. You okay, Shifu?" Monkey asked.

"No I don't-"

"It supposed to taint my heart…" Shifu blurted out. He seemed to be ignoring their present. "My mind should have been feeling…. *hic*… flea,"

"Flea?"

"I think he meant 'free'," Mantis added.

"Wait," Crane spoke in a disturbed manner, "Is he drunk?"

"What? No way."

Frankly, at closer inspection, their master was far from normal - his face turned red, his eyes gobbled, one open, one half shut - and he was nowhere seating straight as usual.

"Oh damn," murmured Tigress between her lips. Horrified on the fact that she had accidentally swapped the gift with Shifu's tea.

_This… is … bad…_

"I thought Tiger Hill Tea was… *hic*… Good, but now this, this _is_ disturbing! Like I was drinking a … *hic*… grape win-nee….!"

"Urhh…" Po widened his eyes. "Emergency here!"

"Wait, wait, wait, this is getting interesting!" said Mantis.

"What?" Crane panicked.

Shifu drunk the whole cup in one shot, and poured another cup for himself.

"Ahh… I think we need to stop him, right?"

"I thought my whole life was… *hic* … misherable, being a bad husband who's been dumped by… *hic* … waffle."

"Waffle?" Tigress raised an eyebrow.

"Wife," Crane corrected.

"Shifu got a wife?" Monkey startled, "wow, I didn't know that,"

"Personal matters here!" Po closed his ears. "Not hearing!"

"I thought we're happy together…*hic*… she being taller than me," the red panda paused for a while. He seemed to be in deep thought before he added, "of course, everyone else is."

Monkey and Mantis started giggling. They were soon stopped by Viper's angry stare.

Shifu took another gulp on the wine. "Fell my eyes on her when we were under Woogway's teaching…. *hic*… You shoo haff seen her… meautiful beyond *hic*… wasp…"

"Whaa?"

"'Words'," Crane corrected again.

"O-courses… everyone think I am mad," Shifu continued, "having a wife different from my own species…"

Everyone raised an eyebrow at that very instant.

_Holy…_

"Oh, my dear… Why did you *hic*… leave me in the ferb place.. *hic*..."

Po frowned. "That's sad."

"No," Crane frowned as his choice of word, "that's _very_ weird."

"But then…" Shifu slammed the cup on the table, causing everyone to jump. "We never get married anyway."

"Whaa?"

"Okay," Crane said. "I am confused."

"Since.. *hic*," Shifu drunk down another cup of wine, "I never talked to her any- *hic* way…"

Monkey burst out laughing, coiling his tail while he dropped from his chair.

Viper and Tigress frowned at the impression.

"Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho," Mantis grinned as if his mouth had stretched as wide as his face could bear, "secret love eh, Shifu?"

"But I still luv her...… My *hic* dear love…"

"What have I done?" Tigress squeezed her head in her arms, while her friends laughed out loud.

* * *

Yes, yes, and the time goes on and on until Shifu finally passed out. They set him to bed, cleaned up the kitchen, and finally, went back to sleep. The night was as silent as always, it would have been a boring moment for them to pass through. Yet chance come to them, the night was merrier than usual. The gang even chatted to each other before they slept. Laughing in their own room as they hear the others mimicked what their master had said.

"Okay, guys, cut it out and go to sleep will you?" Tigress shouted from her room.

"Wookaaaay," said everyone simultaneously before laughing out loud again.

On the next day, Shifu had a complain of headache, but nobody explained a thing about what happened last night, at least, not ever will they tell him about the things he had spoken when he wasn't aware. The wine was quickly replaced with a new one, a tea, of course, and as for Tigress, she was a bit surprise when she and Mantis met Zu about a week later.

"Thank you, Master Tigress! The tea was great!" said Zu as she approached Tigress.

"Nawh, don't mention it…" said Tigress, trying to act as if nothing had gone wrong with the tea-wine swapping case.

"But," Zu tipped her finger on her cheek, "I had no clue about what you're referring to when you say 'Careful on the dose, it's pretty high'."

As quickly as it came, Tigress felt like she was hit by a brick.

_Damn! There was supposed to be a wine. What should I tell her now?_

"You know," Mantis said, covering Tigress's hot trail. "That tea brings youth to many grown up. That's what Tigress here want you to have it. Keep your youth memories, no?"

_What? Wow... Thanks mantis... _For once, Tigress felt impressed by Mantis's ability at giving nonsenses and _bullshit_...

But, her fear raised when she caught a very disturbing grin at Mantis's cheek.

"You see," Mantis added.

_Oh nooo..._

"Master Tigress here tends to drink it as it keeps her beauty."

"I what?" the feline couldn't held back the expression of surprise.

Zu laughed before Tigress could protest. Just as she wanted to pawn the bug dead, Mantis added again, "You know she is at her forty, right?"

"Really? I had no idea, Tigress! Gosh!" Zu laughed very hard.

_NOOOOO! I am merely thirty!_

"And –"

"Wooo-kay, I think that's all about it," Tigress scooped the bug into her grip quickly. "See you around Zu haha hehe hope you don't drink to much of that at once… haha it will get backfired and you will get the reverse effect hehe thank you very much have a nice day, bye!"

And they leaved, as quick as Tigress's legs could carry her, with Mantis crashing under her grip.

What happened to Mantis at that very day…

Is a history.

**The End**

* * *

Author's Note: Well, that sums up the second chap of A day off. :) Hope you guys enjoyed. If you have the time, please review the story, and have a good day. Ciao


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